I wish I were a dog. No, really!
If I were a dog, I could lay around and sleep all day, have several meals served to me by doting people who love me, play when I'm in the mood, and... well, that's about it.
Instead, my days consist of getting up at the crack of dawn in order to get some work done before the kids get up, followed by dragging them out of bed and trying to get them to "do something." Anything. (Other than watch television, that is; if left to their own accord, they'd be like vegetables before the end of one week... vegetables who can quote George Lopez verbatim but can't remember how to spell their own names.)
After school being out for two months already, the pool (now mostly empty) is the temperature of a hot tub, we've seen several movies, they've gone roller skating, have had friends over, and have done all the rest of the things kids do during summer break. I, on the other hand, have done very little that adults like to do, as there is no money (or energy) left after paying for the aforementioned activities and more.
They're done. We're ALL done. Even the cats are bored; I swear they rolled their eyes at me this morning when I opened the door to the screened porch and suggested they go scare some birds. Sure, there's Girl Scout camp next week, several more parties and play dates, people coming from out of town to visit. But in the end, all of us are ready for back to school time.
But there's still a month to go.
Sigh. I think I'll go next door and hang out with the neighbor's dog.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Friday, July 9, 2010
Lake Lover's Ordeal
We just returned from a five-day vacation at the lake house with anywhere from four and six kids at any given time.
I know, I know, I can hear you gasp. Just like my husband and I gasped at the grocery bill. But in reality, the abundance of kids was not nearly as exhausting as one might imagine... There is a phenomenon in which it is relatively relaxing to allow the kids to bring friends, thus eliminating bickering amongst themselves and allowing the six-hour days of pulling kids on tubes, knee boards, water skis, and wake boards to be far more enjoyable.
So what was the ordeal? The air-conditioning. Which we are paying a fortune to have entirely replaced with a super-efficient, snow-blowing, guaranteed-to-make-us-freeze system.
It was supposed to be finished the week before but it was back ordered. So in between meals, towels, sunscreen, etc. for six kids, myself, and my husband, there were also a multitude of workmen in and out of the house, pounding all day, 92 degree indoor temperatures, an accidental hole in the carpet, an accidental hole in the wall, and the update that, alas, they didn't realize there is some ventilation problem, and we will need to hire yet another contractor to install two attic fans and blow foam insulation in our unreachable attic.
Not to mention the (household) water. Which has nothing to do with the air-conditioning, but was an unfortunate coincidence. Our subdivision well sprung a leak, thus resulting in barely a dribble of water ALL WEEK, making us have to painstakingly fill up pails in order to even flush the toilets and having to reassure all the kids that "don't worry, you're getting clean in the lake."
We're home a day early. I'm sure it will all work out in the end, and I know the kids had a good time, but for we adults--who are normally hardcore lake lovers--it was a bit of an ordeal. Sigh.
I know, I know, I can hear you gasp. Just like my husband and I gasped at the grocery bill. But in reality, the abundance of kids was not nearly as exhausting as one might imagine... There is a phenomenon in which it is relatively relaxing to allow the kids to bring friends, thus eliminating bickering amongst themselves and allowing the six-hour days of pulling kids on tubes, knee boards, water skis, and wake boards to be far more enjoyable.
So what was the ordeal? The air-conditioning. Which we are paying a fortune to have entirely replaced with a super-efficient, snow-blowing, guaranteed-to-make-us-freeze system.
It was supposed to be finished the week before but it was back ordered. So in between meals, towels, sunscreen, etc. for six kids, myself, and my husband, there were also a multitude of workmen in and out of the house, pounding all day, 92 degree indoor temperatures, an accidental hole in the carpet, an accidental hole in the wall, and the update that, alas, they didn't realize there is some ventilation problem, and we will need to hire yet another contractor to install two attic fans and blow foam insulation in our unreachable attic.
Not to mention the (household) water. Which has nothing to do with the air-conditioning, but was an unfortunate coincidence. Our subdivision well sprung a leak, thus resulting in barely a dribble of water ALL WEEK, making us have to painstakingly fill up pails in order to even flush the toilets and having to reassure all the kids that "don't worry, you're getting clean in the lake."
We're home a day early. I'm sure it will all work out in the end, and I know the kids had a good time, but for we adults--who are normally hardcore lake lovers--it was a bit of an ordeal. Sigh.
Monday, June 28, 2010
How Can I Be This Busy?
Summer is here. The kids are out of school, my book is in limbo, and I have no big client projects to work on. So how can I be so busy?
Sure, there are the typical household chores that need to be done: laundry, food shopping, maintaining the house, picking up the cat's prescription food. But those things are normally accomplished even when work is busy.
I think I've identified the problem: I tend to leave "big projects" for the summer, thinking I'll have all the time in the world to get them done. Cleaning the kids' closets with them (a mother's torture). Well visits, eye exams, and dental cleanings (ugh!). Letting all four kids invite friends to the lake house over the course of a week, resulting in anywhere from 8-12 kids at any given time, all of whom need to be picked up, dropped off, and fed, but few of whom can provide a real answer as to when exactly they'll be joining us.
On my desk are four lists, none of which are getting any tasks crossed off because I am stalling by ranting on this blog.
Okay. Deep breath. I will tackle the list. Lists. Soon. As soon as I have some more coffee and read another chapter in the book I just started reading. It is, after all, summer.
Sure, there are the typical household chores that need to be done: laundry, food shopping, maintaining the house, picking up the cat's prescription food. But those things are normally accomplished even when work is busy.
I think I've identified the problem: I tend to leave "big projects" for the summer, thinking I'll have all the time in the world to get them done. Cleaning the kids' closets with them (a mother's torture). Well visits, eye exams, and dental cleanings (ugh!). Letting all four kids invite friends to the lake house over the course of a week, resulting in anywhere from 8-12 kids at any given time, all of whom need to be picked up, dropped off, and fed, but few of whom can provide a real answer as to when exactly they'll be joining us.
On my desk are four lists, none of which are getting any tasks crossed off because I am stalling by ranting on this blog.
Okay. Deep breath. I will tackle the list. Lists. Soon. As soon as I have some more coffee and read another chapter in the book I just started reading. It is, after all, summer.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
The Finished Novel: Dream or Doom?
My novel is finished! Actually, it's been finished for quite a while, but I decided that I wouldn't query any agents to move toward publishing until I have absolutely, positively, not even the slightest urge to make sticky notes, go back and fix something, or anything else that remotely resembles editing.
I'm happy to say, I reached that point a few weeks ago. Yay for me! In fact, to take a quote directly from my family dinner table, "Total yayness!"
So why is the title of this post, "Dream or Doom?" Because now that my query letters have been sent and I have no book to work on, here is how my day looks:
Wake up. Check e-mail to see if there are any query responses.
Pour coffee. Check to see if there are any query responses.
Do a couple of household chores that don't take me too far away from the computer because I have to be able to check. And check, and check, and check.
Decide that it would be best to leave the house. Go out, do some clothes shopping, take the kids to the pool, do a large grocery shopping, and return in no longer than 15 minutes.
Check e-mail and find that there is a query response and they've requested a partial! Send partial immediately, then resume checking because surely the agent is sitting at her computer, holding her breath and unable to concentrate on anything else because she's so excited about my book.
Check again. Get reprimanded by Gmail because it's been checked too recently.
And so on.
I've received some positive responses. I'm excited! A few days have gone by and I've now developed my new plan: Leave the house. Every day. Do other things. Do not think about my finished book, my next book, my old book, or anything else that resembles a book of any kind. Maybe read a magazine, but also go the long way so I don't have to drive past the library, which makes me think about books. My books.
Okay, I'm obsessed. I admit it.
Thank goodness I don't have e-mail on my cell phone. Wait!... I think the Apple Store is having a sale... which would be shopping and therefore counts toward my plan of keeping busy...
See? I'm doomed. And it's a dream. Both. Wish me luck!
I'm happy to say, I reached that point a few weeks ago. Yay for me! In fact, to take a quote directly from my family dinner table, "Total yayness!"
So why is the title of this post, "Dream or Doom?" Because now that my query letters have been sent and I have no book to work on, here is how my day looks:
Wake up. Check e-mail to see if there are any query responses.
Pour coffee. Check to see if there are any query responses.
Do a couple of household chores that don't take me too far away from the computer because I have to be able to check. And check, and check, and check.
Decide that it would be best to leave the house. Go out, do some clothes shopping, take the kids to the pool, do a large grocery shopping, and return in no longer than 15 minutes.
Check e-mail and find that there is a query response and they've requested a partial! Send partial immediately, then resume checking because surely the agent is sitting at her computer, holding her breath and unable to concentrate on anything else because she's so excited about my book.
Check again. Get reprimanded by Gmail because it's been checked too recently.
And so on.
I've received some positive responses. I'm excited! A few days have gone by and I've now developed my new plan: Leave the house. Every day. Do other things. Do not think about my finished book, my next book, my old book, or anything else that resembles a book of any kind. Maybe read a magazine, but also go the long way so I don't have to drive past the library, which makes me think about books. My books.
Okay, I'm obsessed. I admit it.
Thank goodness I don't have e-mail on my cell phone. Wait!... I think the Apple Store is having a sale... which would be shopping and therefore counts toward my plan of keeping busy...
See? I'm doomed. And it's a dream. Both. Wish me luck!
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Drawing the Line on Sunscreen
I live in NC. Which means that although it's only mid-June, it's been "summer" for well over a month already. Further clarified, this also means that we have already been in full-fledged sunscreen mode for weeks.
Every day, I thank my lucky stars that I have already passed the phase of life in which my kids were wriggly, uncooperative little beasts, requiring me to hold on to their slippery little wrists with the grip of death in order to get the lotion slathered onto them. (While listening to them cry about how it's not fair, they don't like it, etc, etc, etc.)
Now they're old enough to understand that no one is going anywhere until the sunscreen is on. They also (due to my "mean momminess") understand how much a sunburn hurts, having experienced it firsthand over the past few summers when I decided that maybe they'd learn better from experience than from my lectures.
But of course this year brings a new dilemma. Advances in technology have not missed the sunscreen market. Thus, there is now the availability of spray-on sunblock that requires no rubbing, takes two seconds, isn't slimy, and works great. The problem? It's so expensive, I'd have to take out a second mortgage if my plan were to use it on four kids every day for the six months that are summery.
At $10 per spray can, and the ability to easily go through a whole can each day, it seems that I'm now back to holding on to their (much bigger) slippery wrists, trying to force the $5-a-bottle-and-will-last-three-weeks lotion onto them.
Unless I can get them to pay for the spray with their own money? Excuse me while I go assign some chores.
On the other hand, I'm broke. From buying the spray sunscreen.
Sigh... I guess that brings me back to the mean momminess of letting them get burnt if they refuse to get lotioned. Sometimes parenting really does feel like a perfectly round circle.
Every day, I thank my lucky stars that I have already passed the phase of life in which my kids were wriggly, uncooperative little beasts, requiring me to hold on to their slippery little wrists with the grip of death in order to get the lotion slathered onto them. (While listening to them cry about how it's not fair, they don't like it, etc, etc, etc.)
Now they're old enough to understand that no one is going anywhere until the sunscreen is on. They also (due to my "mean momminess") understand how much a sunburn hurts, having experienced it firsthand over the past few summers when I decided that maybe they'd learn better from experience than from my lectures.
But of course this year brings a new dilemma. Advances in technology have not missed the sunscreen market. Thus, there is now the availability of spray-on sunblock that requires no rubbing, takes two seconds, isn't slimy, and works great. The problem? It's so expensive, I'd have to take out a second mortgage if my plan were to use it on four kids every day for the six months that are summery.
At $10 per spray can, and the ability to easily go through a whole can each day, it seems that I'm now back to holding on to their (much bigger) slippery wrists, trying to force the $5-a-bottle-and-will-last-three-weeks lotion onto them.
Unless I can get them to pay for the spray with their own money? Excuse me while I go assign some chores.
On the other hand, I'm broke. From buying the spray sunscreen.
Sigh... I guess that brings me back to the mean momminess of letting them get burnt if they refuse to get lotioned. Sometimes parenting really does feel like a perfectly round circle.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Why Bother Cleaning a House, Anyway?
Cleaning. Sometimes it seems so pointless. Other times it seems so mandatory. I mean really, for whom are we cleaning, anyway?
The kids? Surely they not only don't care, but would actually prefer if things were left messy, thereby disguising their contributions to the chaos.
The husbands? Ahem. Most of them would be perfectly happy to store all of their laundry on the floor beside the bed if it weren't for we wives who so diligently provide a hamper-home for such things. And for those neatnick guys, like mine? Neat is usually their goal, actual dusting and polishing not nearly as important.
The pets? No way. Tumbleweed furballs are their goal and our vacuuming only makes them have to start all over again.
The neighbors/friends that might stop by or be invited over? Maybe. I mean, my take on the issue is that if you stop by unannounced and have to step over forty-seven loads piled in my kitchen on laundry day, that's a risk you'll have to take. Invited guests on the other hand, should be able to at least walk across the room, not stick to the floors, and have a clean towel to dry their hands on in the bathroom.
Really, when I clean, I clean for me. Because I don't like cluttery items spread throughout the home. Because dust on my furniture makes me feel guilty for not taking good care of my furniture (the down-side of knowing what I paid for it). Because fur tumbleweeds make me feel guilty about my stepson who is mildly allergic to cats.
Come to think of it, that's the answer. For me, anyway. It's the guilt that is laid upon me--not by other humans, but by my furniture, my carpets, and my vacuum cleaner who sits sadly in the closet when I don't use it. Which all translates to mean that really, it's me, laying the guilt on myself.
Guilt. To some extent, it's a mother's curse, I guess. What's your take?
The kids? Surely they not only don't care, but would actually prefer if things were left messy, thereby disguising their contributions to the chaos.
The husbands? Ahem. Most of them would be perfectly happy to store all of their laundry on the floor beside the bed if it weren't for we wives who so diligently provide a hamper-home for such things. And for those neatnick guys, like mine? Neat is usually their goal, actual dusting and polishing not nearly as important.
The pets? No way. Tumbleweed furballs are their goal and our vacuuming only makes them have to start all over again.
The neighbors/friends that might stop by or be invited over? Maybe. I mean, my take on the issue is that if you stop by unannounced and have to step over forty-seven loads piled in my kitchen on laundry day, that's a risk you'll have to take. Invited guests on the other hand, should be able to at least walk across the room, not stick to the floors, and have a clean towel to dry their hands on in the bathroom.
Really, when I clean, I clean for me. Because I don't like cluttery items spread throughout the home. Because dust on my furniture makes me feel guilty for not taking good care of my furniture (the down-side of knowing what I paid for it). Because fur tumbleweeds make me feel guilty about my stepson who is mildly allergic to cats.
Come to think of it, that's the answer. For me, anyway. It's the guilt that is laid upon me--not by other humans, but by my furniture, my carpets, and my vacuum cleaner who sits sadly in the closet when I don't use it. Which all translates to mean that really, it's me, laying the guilt on myself.
Guilt. To some extent, it's a mother's curse, I guess. What's your take?
Thursday, June 3, 2010
A Blog About Blogs
Some of my readers may be wondering why I would write a blog about blogs. Others are wondering, What in the world is a blog, anyway? Thus today's blog, "A Blog About Blogs."
Basically, a blog is a Website, usually maintained by the person it's about (me!), and which is updated frequently with short articles. The idea of a blog is to share your thoughts, keep people posted on what's happening, etc.
As a reader, you can comment on a blog... in effect having a conversation with the person who wrote the article and/or the other people who have commented. (Simply click the "Comment" button at the bottom of the article.)
If you think others will be interested, you can share the blog on your Facebook page with one click of the "Share on Facebook" icon to the right.
If you really, really enjoy that person's blog, you can choose to "follow" that person's blog. Again, at the right of this page, you can click "Follow Lori's Blog" and you will be notified each time I post a new article.
If you browse the web, you'll find that many people have blogs--it's truly mind-bloggling. The nice part is, you can choose to read them, not read them, participate, share, follow, comment (or not)... allowing you to stay posted on things you're interested in.
So, that's the long and the short of it. A blog is what you're reading right now. Hope you'll come back again soon!
Basically, a blog is a Website, usually maintained by the person it's about (me!), and which is updated frequently with short articles. The idea of a blog is to share your thoughts, keep people posted on what's happening, etc.
As a reader, you can comment on a blog... in effect having a conversation with the person who wrote the article and/or the other people who have commented. (Simply click the "Comment" button at the bottom of the article.)
If you think others will be interested, you can share the blog on your Facebook page with one click of the "Share on Facebook" icon to the right.
If you really, really enjoy that person's blog, you can choose to "follow" that person's blog. Again, at the right of this page, you can click "Follow Lori's Blog" and you will be notified each time I post a new article.
If you browse the web, you'll find that many people have blogs--it's truly mind-bloggling. The nice part is, you can choose to read them, not read them, participate, share, follow, comment (or not)... allowing you to stay posted on things you're interested in.
So, that's the long and the short of it. A blog is what you're reading right now. Hope you'll come back again soon!
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